i dunno how to day how i feel now. pissed dosen't even begin to say it.

isn't it enough to have your world, your all, crumble in front of you?FOR YOU PEOPLE.i had to pull myself together, to do well for logs so that you all wouldn't have such a heavy burden.
i don't complain.for doing more work. to pull more than my own weight at the helm so that you guys can concentrate on other stuff and enjoy yourselves.

you people don't even bother to HELP with the easy stuff. i ask for a little, and you all say i slack. IT'S YOUR BLOODY JOB IN THE FIRST PLACE.

even getting resources is hard. i have to ask MANY times before i have to go the extra mile to get it myself.

even thru all my pain, my struggles, i don't even mention them to any of you, to let all of you carry on. but no. you all just shoved me down no matter what i did.

I"M SORRY FOR WORKING EXTRA HARD. for sleeping less just to get the job done. i know you all stay up late too. but if i didn't do all this, you'd be sleepin much later.

i sacrificed more than i had to. and i get ticked off for doing so. wth.

it's hard eonugh to hide what i have inside. it's worse when the people around you push you down further.

hell since when did i even care about HPT?
i don't even come to meetings, much less ask for one.
and all i get are grumbles and complaints.
FINE. now you just do whatever you want. cos i'm just gonna do what i have to, NO MORE, NO LESS.

i got my own troubles. i'm sry if i was mre nasty recently, mre blunt and inconsiderate.
but this is the time, i have to fight my own battle.since you people just care about YOU. till i gain victory on the inside, and peace resurfaces again, you will only see shadows of what i used to be.

.